Go hide in the bathroom

The question my students ask me most is how to meditate. There are about 500 million ways to meditate--but my students, particularly those with children--they really want to know where and when and how the heck do I get my children to leave me alone for 5 minutes. My answer is always, "Go hide in the bathroom."

I know this sounds very crazy. Perhaps a little gross. And a wee bit extreme. But, I have a long history of hiding in the bathroom. I hid in the bathroom when I was so tired of being yelled at for screwing up during an elementary school game of volleyball. I hid in a powder room when I was uncomfortable meeting Mike's extended family for the first time. I hid in my parents bathroom when I broke curfew (secretly hoping, they'd give up and fall asleep before grounding me). I hid in the bathroom just last week when the Mormons came knocking.

I also find myself locking the door and taking a hot, long shower and just well, breathing. The children have to fully occupied, but if they stray (because when they want me, Mike is powerless to stop them), the shower is running and the door is locked and well, I can't hear them.

Other times, when the girls are being chaotic and crazy (their natural disposition), I take 30 seconds and hide in the bathroom. I just pause and I breathe. I compose myself. Ask for patience and a kind-heart and then I go back to the fray.

The bathroom is sort of my sacred place. Weird, yes. But it is highly functional. The 5 minutes in the shower or the 30 second pauses--those are like the "thinking before I speak," moments for my soul. I emerge from my bathroom meditation, a little kinder, a lot more patient and a tiny bit closer to bliss.

So, how do you meditate? Just go hide in the bathroom. Everyone has one. No special equipment required.

Play lacrosse. Love wastefully.

Today Lily will be officially adopted by the Temple Women's Lacrosse team through the Friends of Jaclyn Foundation. FOJ is an amazing organization that matches children with brain tumors with collegiate athletic teams. The children and their family get a support system and in Lily's case--25 amazing, inspiring sisters, who happen to be kick-ass athletes; 3 talented coaches and all their extended families. It is big.

This relationship is still new--we've been to just 3 games since Easter. Earlier this year, I wrote about loving wastefully--throwing love around like it is limitless. The Temple Lacrosse Team and their families love more than anyone I've ever encountered.

Friday, I received a Facebook post from one of the team members that ended with, "I love you." There it was, in black and white, a declaration of Love from a woman, who I met only a handful of times. I wrote, "I love you"back. It made my day to love someone who I just met, because, well, it was easy. Throwing love around is the most wonderful feeling. Having love thrown at you is like Christmas. It is magic.

So many of us agonize over 'I love you.' In a romantic relationship, it is a turning point, a commitment to a future. In life, 'I love you,' is medicinal--it is the fuel our souls need to soar, to wake up in the morning and face the day and for our family (especially for me), "I love you, " is all the hope I need. Where there is love, there is joy and when there is joy and love--mountains move, miracles happen and we all love wastefully.

To our new Temple Lacrosse family--We love you. Thank you for this gift and for a place in your family. xoxo

The Blissful Bride

I have to admit that I am certain I may have bit a teeny bit crazy when I was planning my wedding. I was completely overwhelmed. I hadn't found yoga yet and certainly did not know how to meditate.

Planning a wedding is like planning a royal ball for all the most important people in your life. It is a memory that 150 of your closest friends and relatives will talk about at cocktail parties.

And then of course there is the small detail of planning a marriage. The marriage is absolutely life changing--you are uniting your soul and your life path with another person. A person who may steal the covers at night or who may leave loads of dirty dishes in the sink. A person who may not care about the difference between crimson roses and hot pink hydrangea. A person who you love in spite of all this. The person who wish to live with forever.

No matter how much help you have-family, friends, wedding planners and therapists-it is overwhelming. You spend all your time looking outward and no time with your inner self.

To find your inner blissful bride, try yoga and meditation. Each morning and each evening, take 5 minutes. Pause. Sit still. Close your eyes. Inhale and exhale. That's it. Pure bliss, in a breath. Maybe your mind wanders a little in these 5 minutes. Call it back in with your breath.

And try a class with me and my company Trinitas Yoga. I am so excited to debut the Blissful Bride yoga at the Spring Soiree in the City on Sunday, April 25. You spend hours and weeks planning the perfect event, why not take an hour just for you. Whether you want to tone up and look great in your wedding dress or you are in some desperate need of some downtime, yoga is an amazing way to address your personal wellness goals. Become a Blissful Bride and watch your inner goddess walk down the aisle.

See you at the Soiree!

The why

To say I became a yoga instructor because I love yoga is too simple.

My first yoga class was in Vermont and it was impossible. I could barely forward bend. I could barely cobra. And downward dog was a disaster. Something about it had me intrigued however, I think maybe it was the instructor telling me I could do it. Reminding me that with my breath, all things were possible. And also saying that yoga was the hardest thing in the world--harder than throwing the winning pitch or winning a nobel peace prize. Yoga was so hard because it was real. It was breath, movement and soul all wrapped up.

I fancied myself a yogini after one class. I entertained myself by attempting handstands and crow. I took yoga classes all over the place--where ever I lived, I yoga-ed, sporadically. Then Lily got sick and I abandoned it all completely. Then Mike reminded me that I had a yoga mat and a book of baby yoga. His simple reminder changed everything.

We did the simplest yoga poses with Lily. Poses for newborns and nearly newborns that required nearly no physical participation. Lily could barely move. We could not pick her up without her crying. Her vertigo was so bad that even turning her over in bed would cause her to scream and try to fall asleep and vomit. It was heartbreaking. But then everyday, we did yoga. The three of us, on my purple mat on the Oncology floor at CHOP. And then one day, after her final brain surgery for a shunt placement, Lily woke up from the anesthesia crawling and writhing in bed. My girl was back. She could crawl, she attempted to sit and she was feisty. Lily somehow reconnected her body with her mind and her spirit.

I really felt like I witnessed some sort of miracle. Then months later, I started back into my yoga practice and working with my own body. A few times, I felt the connection--I felt my mind linking with my spine that was bending into cobra and it was as if my soul was opening. It was perfection for a split second.

There are times when I teach that I witness a student find the same connection. It is amazing. They just get it in Warrior 1 or I can see them relax into downward dog, like it is an old friend. It is a miracle; this mind-body-spirit connection. So, that is why I am a yoga instructor. I am hungry to witness miracles.

Lemonade, Part 1

I bought my first cup of Alex's Lemonade at Children's Hopsital of Philadelphia on June 8, 2007. Lily was upstairs in the Pediatric Intensive Care Unit, preparing for yet another brain surgery.

That Lemonade tasted so good. I was hooked. I proceeded to purchase about $200 in Alex Lemonade Stand Foundation gear--t-shirts, pins, books, tattoos and bracelets.

Later that day I snuck downstairs and listened to Liz Scott, Alex's mother, speak. She spoke about cancer and Alex and research and well, I was in awe that she could speak of "it," of pediatric cancer.

No one talks about pediatric cancer enough. Pediatric cancer research is consistently underfunded as compared to adult cancer research. Yet, it is the leading cause of death by disease in children under the age of 15 in the United States. It is the second leading cause death overall, only behind accidents.

Everyday 36 children are diagnosed with cancer. Every year 12,000 children are diagnosed in the United States. And 2,500 of those diagnosed won't survive. All of those diagnosed are changed forever and in for a bumpy, terrifying ride.

Lily is on that ride. We thank God everyday for her remission and beg for it to continue. We know so many survivors and fighters--Cassie, Avi, Calla, Drew--so many sweet children who just need a cure.

This year, Lily (and Chloe) will host the second annual Lemonade Stand for ALSF. Lily's goal is to sell some lemonade and help her friends--those she knows personally and those she knows need her help. She also wants to help her teachers and her doctors. This is the beauty of Alex's Lemonade Stand Foundation--it is about children helping children. Lily's stand will be on June 12, all-day at our house. This year, we hope to raise $5,000--money that will go to fund pediatric cancer research, support families during treatment and find a cure.

Please come, buy some lemonade (or make your donation online now!) and help Lily's friends. Visit Lily's Lemonade Stand at: http://www.alexslemonade.org/events/lily-adkins-lemonade-stand-0